12 Times Fans Hated Their Favorite Band’s Big Hits

Those in whom we make investments a lot of our emotional capital have the best capability to disappoint us. Imagine being a Billy Joel fan in 1989 when the native DJ introduced there was a brand new Billy Joel track he was going to play and also you, the Billy Joel fan, felt the anticipation rise inside you. It had been three years since The Bridge, and also you wanted some new music from him such as you wanted air, such as you wanted water, such as you wanted meals.

And the DJ performed the file, and the primary phrases you hear out of your hero have been “Harry Truman, Doris Day, Red China, Johnnie Ray, South Pacific, Walter Winchell, Joe DiMaggio.” A recitation, not a track.

The disappointment was deep and abiding. Our favourite artists give us a lot pleasure, however they’re additionally those that may harm us essentially the most. Here, we offer you a dozen occasions our favourite artists have given us songs we hate, together with the phrases of normal followers who took to the web to precise their displeasure. Or simply to rant. We take it to the folks; we hearken to their voices.

Cheap Trick, “The Flame”
Mired within the deepest business funk of their profession, the agency of Zander, Nielsen, Petersson and Carlos sought help from exterior writers, two of whom (Bob Mitchell and Nick Graham) introduced them an influence ballad that even Elkie Brooks didn’t need. Nevertheless, they recorded it and had the largest single of their lives, a lot much less their careers — No. 1 within the U.S., Australia and Canada. It’s a track they need to play each time they take the stage, wedged in among the many spunky tracks of their youth (“ELO Kiddies,” “Clock Strikes Ten,” “Surrender”) and the surprisingly spunky tracks of their dotage (“No Direction Home,” “Long Time Coming,” “The Summer Looks Good on You”).

Those who’re keen on these energetic rock songs and who didn’t have teenage crushes in 1988 would possibly go for the beer vendor when Cheap Trick play “The Flame” reside. They could be in good firm. Back within the early ‘90s, as grunge bands like Nirvana were claiming Cheap Trick as one of their forebears, the band’s file firm was on the lookout for extra hits like “The Flame.” “All those bands would say, ‘We love Cheap Trick, except the stuff they’re doing now,’” Tom Petersson informed Rolling Stone.

“This song still makes me wince,” wrote one fan on Amazon. “It’s not terrible as ballads go, but it’s a pretty lowest common denominator kind of song,” mentioned one other in a submit titled “Over produced [sic] crap.”

R.E.M., “Shiny Happy People”
Perhaps the strangest factor a band like R.E.M. (who have been sometimes given to doing unusual issues) might do was to put in writing a singalong track like “Shiny Happy People.” Michael Stipe blames all of it on his bandmates. “The guys would give me pieces of music that were so ebullient and bubblegum,” he informed The Sun, “that I’d be like, ‘Okay, I accept your challenge and I raise you.” He hearkened back to his earliest record-buying days, when he collected 45 RPM singles by like the Archies and the Monkees. And he channeled that into a song about little more than being happy. And it was a hit, striking the bottom rung of the Top 10 on the Billboard Hot 100 singles chart.

In other words, somebody liked the song. Just not everybody, and some hardcore fans are vociferous in their hatred. “When push comes to shove, the main reason I hate this fucking song is that it’s so annoying on every single possible level,” Brendan Kelly, leader of the Chicago punk band the Lawrence Arms, told PunkNews. “The lyrics irritate me, that fucking jangly riff in the beginning of it makes me insane and the sad French circus breakdown is fucking pompous. I think there’s an intellectual reason to hate this song and there’s a visceral reason to hate this song, and I firmly hate it for both reasons.”

A quick gander through Amazon’s scores finds a variety of people that agree with Kelly. “Possibly the worst song in history,” says somebody referred to as rem fan. “Really makes me want to punch someone,” says one other consumer. “It’s Michael Stipe’s transparent attempt at a ‘love’ anthem, like the Beatles’ ‘All You Need is Love’ … only stupid,” writes yet one more fan.

Billy Joel, “We Didn’t Start the Fire”
Billy Joel didn’t write this checklist (it’s not a track — it’s a listing, set to 4 chords) to be “Cliff Notes for the MTV generation,” as one critic put it. “I wish people could understand that I did not write that song to be a hit – I wrote that one for me,” he informed Rolling Stone in 1989. He added “Most of my mail I get about that song comes from teachers who have said this is the greatest teaching tool to come down the pike since Sesame Street, which means a lot to me, since I once wanted to be a history teacher.”

If there’s one solution to make Oscar the Grouch grouchier, or children at college extra disinterested and sleepy, it is likely to be to show him/them to “We Didn’t Start the Fire.” Then once more, Joel would possibly agree with them. “I didn’t think it was really that good to begin with,” he informed an viewers of scholars at Oxford in 1994. “Melodically … It’s almost like a dentist drill.” Some folks agree. “I was always annoyed by that song,” wrote somebody named Mr. Peanut (absolutely not the Planter’s peanut spokesman, however an impostor) on a Yahoo board. “A truely [sic] miserable song,” commented one other consumer in the identical thread. “Who elected the people that commited [sic] the errors he sings about?”

Heart, “These Dreams”
This is the band whose singer lower out the center of a sleazy file govt in “Barracuda” and made him watch it, nonetheless beating, as he expired. This is the band that demanded of a lover that he let her wildly make like to him in “Crazy on You.” This is the band that coated Aaron Neville, Little Richard, the Righteous Brothers and Led Zeppelin … on the identical album. Then this band hit No. 1 by letting the singer’s sister take lead vocals because it rolled out a snoozy, synthy track co-written by the man who wrote Starship’s  “We Built This City.” If there have been any barracuda current, they have been in all probability being served as lunch, on silver platters, delivered by faeries and fauns.

Amazon commenter Clear Channel Sucks (so we all know how he/she feels about that) famous, “This is very tacky by a ‘rock band’ and it sure shows it. Zero stars on ‘[T]hese [D]reams.’” “Next to Heart’s new and previous materials, the ‘80s stuff is cringe-worthy,” wrote a fan.

Chuck Berry, “My Ding-a-Ling”
To think this puerile novelty song was Chuck Berry’s solely No. 1 hit is proof that we people very often have tin ears and stumps for brains, and that even one of many nice songwriters and performers ever to place pen to paper and duck toes to the stage, can generally make unhealthy, unhealthy choices.

What notably hurts right here is that the double-entendre (“ding-a-ling” for penis, in case you didn’t get it) is so broad and apparent, an excessive amount of so for use by a person whose present of wordplay was for a time second to none in early rock ‘n’ roll — who might encode racial injustice right into a track like “Brown-Eyed Handsome Man” or “Nadine,” or fill “Maybelline” and so many others with dense rhymes and coined phrases. “My Ding-A-Ling” was beneath him. The ache is considerably ameliorated by the truth that Berry didn’t write the track; Dave Bartholomew will get the acknowledgement there.

In the phrases of 1 Amazon buyer buyer, “My Ding-a-Ling” “is an embarrassment to listen to and I hope all of the people that pushed it to #1 are forced to listen to it for their eternity. After everything Chuck did for rock’n’roll why did we have to hear ‘MDAL’ [sic]?” He drew an “Amen” from Speedy, who slowed down sufficient to agree. (*12*) he/she writes.

Kiss, “I Was Made for Lovin You”
In David Leaf and Ken Sharp’s Kiss: Behind the Mask:The Official Authorized Biography, we discover out that Paul Stanley took a stab at writing a disco track as a result of he thought a disco track could be simple to put in writing. He was right. He, Desmond Child and producer Vini Poncia put Stanley’s finest come-hither, chest-hair-baring traces to a 120-beats-per-minute, sound-effect-punctuated dance track manufacturing, and instantly you could possibly play Kiss at nightclubs and curler rinks.

Of all of the songs the band recorded, “I Was Made for Lovin’ You” is pinned to a particular second in historical past. You can at all times blast “Rock and Roll All Nite” at a ballgame, or discover “Beth” or “Forever” on grownup modern radio, or hear the neighbor children enjoying “Do You Love Me” or “Heaven’s on Fire” within the storage subsequent door, as a result of they simply found the factor. “I Was Made for Lovin’ You” belongs in a 1979 time capsule with MEGO Kiss figures and Colorforms units.

“I am actually quite embarrassed by it,” an Amazon consumer consumer wrote of the track. “I paid money for it, so I haven’t deleted it. I hope none of my friends see it.” Poor man. “I listened to this and was broken-hearted,” Claudette Adler concurred. “It was some of the worst crap I have ever heard.” “1979 was a pitiful year for KISS,” an unidentified buyer wrote. “What were they thinking?”

The Beach Boys, “Kokomo”
A final-ditch journey up the singles chart for the once-mighty boys of summer season. It’s telling that it took 4 writers to give you lyrics that rhyme Jamaica with “wanna take ya” and Bahama with “pretty mama”; for those who collect up sufficient nickels, you’ll have 1 / 4 in the future. “Kokomo” was a success as a result of it was connected to a Tom Cruise movie (Cocktail) through which Cruise’s character acts like a jerk for 2 hours and nonetheless will get the woman in the long run. In the video for the track, John Stamos performs bongos with the Beach Boys, as he apparently did for some time in actual life, which simply goes to point out you that there’s nothing mediocre that can’t be additional ruined with an look by John Stamos.

Over on Amazon, one connected however unimpressed consumer famous of the track, “My girlfriend likes it more than I do.” In an attention-grabbing twist, an unidentified buyer wrote, “Great Beach Boys tune! … ‘Kokomo’ comes off a bit dated. But I still love it. Definitely worth the download. The rest of the album is …. meh.” It have to be famous that the album in query is the Beach Boys compilation 50 Big Ones: Greatest Hits, and that the “rest of the album” accommodates songs like “Don’t Worry Baby,” “Surfin’ Safari,” “Good Vibrations,” “Help Me, Rhonda,” “Fun, Fun, Fun” and the like.

Bob Seger, “Shakedown”
Bob Seger cherished his solely No. 1 single a lot, he left it off his first Greatest Hits album in favor of a Chuck Berry cowl and a minor new track tacked on so individuals who had all the opposite previous stuff would purchase it. “Shakedown” (which was featured in Beverly Hills Cop II) did make it onto his second quantity of biggest hits, 9 years later.

According to Fred Bronson’s The Billboard Book of Number One Hits, Seger wasn’t even the primary option to file the track — his buddy Glenn Frey had been requested, however Frey didn’t just like the lyrics and mysteriously/conveniently “came down with laryngitis” shortly earlier than he was speculated to file the track. Then Seger acquired the decision and agreed to file the track … if he might rewrite the lyrics. “There were a lot of lyrics about working undercover,” Seger informed Bronson. “I didn’t like them, so I threw them all out.” (“Why didn’t I think of that?” Glenn Frey should have thought briefly, earlier than adjusting the movement management in his Jacuzzi.) Apparently, Seger appreciated the refrain (with the road “Shakedown, breakdown, you’re busted”), and left that in, together with the many-layered wall of synthesizers that overwhelms him all through.

There aren’t many individuals on the market discussing “Shakedown.” One of the few is a dude over on YouTube, who famous, “This is the song you sing before breathing on a stranger’s neck.” “It’s like Bob Seger got drunk and made a deal with the devil,” wrote one other. And a commenter by the title of Django Unchained (we doubt that’s his actual title) merely wrote “Fuck yeasss Bob Seaver its bobbbb ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.” That says all of it, would not it?

Aerosmith, “I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing”
Aerosmith shouldn’t be recording Diane Warren songs for Bruce Willis area films. They needs to be difficult Ted Nugent and Deep Purple to see who headlines the subsequent all-day arduous rock jam-fest within the desert. Which desert? Any desert. Bring Black Oak Arkansas and Mahogany Rush and Sammy Hagar alongside, play all day and social gathering all night time.

Of course, that Aerosmith would not exist anymore; they’ve been changed by the older, wiser Aerosmith that search for alternatives to construct their model and stake out a spot for themselves with the youthful crowd, the one that wishes to see Steven Tyler’s daughter and Ben Affleck actually make a go of it collectively, as a result of they’re meant for one another, you already know?

With the specter of an extinction-level occasion coming down from the celebrities, the very last thing we needs to be fortunate sufficient to listen to earlier than all of us die is Joe Perry ripping a solo from his Les Paul; it’s simply that actually the very last thing we needs to be listening to him rip the solo on is “I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing.”

“JUST A GREAT SONG WHEN YOU NEED THAT REAL LOVE,” one man screamed at us from his Amazon remark. Former American Idol contestant Caleb Johnson informed People journal, “I hate that song,” shortly after the producers compelled him to sing it in entrance of hundreds of thousands of individuals. “I’m always gonna love this song but never listen to it again,” wrote a YouTube consumer, with some notice of finality.

Genesis, “Invisible Touch”
So the band that launched “The Carpet Crawlers,” “Firth of Fifth,” “Squonk,” and the seven-part “Supper’s Ready” hit the big time — the really big time, with stadiums and limos and very good catering — singing “She seems to have an invisible touch-ay!” Like 1985 before it, 1986 more or less belonged to Phil Collins (“Will the Free World ever tire of Phil Collins?” one Chicago Tribune reviewer asked), so much of the blame for “Invisible Touch”’s slickness and silly chorus fell on him, not that it mattered. U.S. listeners bought 6 million copies of Invisible Touch (the album) and sent the single to No. 1, the first and only time Genesis would sit atop the Billboard Hot 100 singles chart.

Not everybody dug it, though. “‘Invisible Touch’ represents the absolute nadir of Phil Collins’ leadership of Genesis,” wrote one Amazon reviewer. “‘Invisible Touch’ is the definition of what singles are today: lame,” added another. “This is where it really gets to be ‘Phil Collins featuring Tony Banks and Mike Rutherford…’ AKA: CHEESE!” yelled yet another not-fan. And A Kid’s Review added, “Man I hate this stupid album. Way too synthesized and the stupid love-dovey romance songs! … I once got beat up by N-SYNC for real. Did y’all know that?” We did not.

Metallica, “Nothing Else Matters”
Metallica play “Nothing Else Matters” at just about every show; at some point between when they walk out onstage and two hours later, Kirk Hammett and James Hetfield will play those arpeggios and begin the slog through the worst song the band ever recorded that’s not on St. Anger. Sometimes they encore with it. Why would they do that to their fans, whom they claim to love? We recall the first time we heard the song, doubling over as if we had been kicked in the stomach. Nothing else mattered, except hitting the next track button on the CD player, which cued up “Wherever I May Roam,” enabling us to uncurl from our defensive position and enjoy music again.

Commenters on YouTube seem to dig the song, at least in retrospect, though tens of thousands gave it a thumbs-down. Lord Ganja indicates that “Nothing Else Matters” was “when they sold out :(.” He’d better not say anything to edie youngblood, who indicates “The 72k people who disliked I want to punch strait [sic] in the face.” Trevor Phillips said the song reminds him of “[w]hen your brother tries to get you killed and fakes his own death, but you forgive him because he’s your brother,” while someone named Θανάσης Ζολώτας wrote, “This song is made for endless sex” (something we’d never before considered).

Rod Stewart, “Da Ya Think I’m Sexy?”
It’s been said that no other artist in rock ‘n’ roll has squandered as much talent and good will in search of widespread popularity as Rod Stewart. We cannot disagree. Want to hear some great ’70s rock — classic songs that fuse the best folk and blues influences with a Stonesy swagger? Go find the first four Rod Stewart albums (and, while you’re at it, grab the first three records he made with the Faces).

Want to hear a story about the most awkward one-night stand ever, set to a disco thump with synthesized strings pushed so far in your face, you can smell the keyboard player’s cologne? For that, you have to play “Da Ya Think I’m Sexy?” The song, to be honest, is kind of cute now, since Stewart has become more of a standards-crooning grandfatherly figure these days, and since “Sexy”’s co-writer Duane Hitchings has told people that the song was Stewart’s way of “spoofing” disco — to bury the leisure suit, not to praise it.

“It’s the blandest recording he’s ever done,” wrote one Amazon user. “[T]his is one interestingly bizarre song,” wrote a YouTube user. “NO, I don’t think ya sexy!” someone named Swearing is for Bistros said, likely believing the tiny Rod onscreen was really questioning him/her. Fortnite TheoryYT dug Stewart’s wardrobe in the video: “He looks like ninja.” Josh IsBaws says the chorus “is me after any girl randomly says ‘hi’ to me.” We root for you, Josh IsBaws, we really do.