There was all the time a darkish matter cloud hovering over my each transfer by way of my days navigating the psychological well being problem of bipolar dysfunction.
A brooding seriousness.
What does that imply, precisely?
If I started to really feel considerably elated at any explicit second, I questioned if an uncontrollable sense of mania would quickly observe my upbeat methods.
I’d then really feel Insecure, confused, uncertain, and insufficient.
My thoughts was tensing up as I anticipated some kind of collision.
It was a ticking time bomb that didn’t exist most of the time. I’d try to diffuse a power that wasn’t there.
Inadvertently, that motion would then produce a bomb.
I used to be immensely troubled by how folks would interpret my well-being and the way that interpretation would change the course of their day.
There is an idea referred to as emotional contagion. Emotional contagion is the infectious nature of our state of being and its affect on different folks.
The feelings of 1 can alter the emotions of one other, which we’ve mentioned in “Bloom” earlier than.
Earlier at this time, I listened to Ben Glenn II, a tv historian, talking on how snicker tracks in comedic items spur boisterous eruptions inside people who won’t have chuckled in any other case.
We are decoding one thing as funnier maybe than it’s as a result of we hear a roar of laughter.
Unknowingly, I used to be obsessive about this notion of emotional contagion.
All these awkward and uncomfortable feelings and emotions I described earlier that I might really feel near on daily basis made me really feel like I needed to continually create a steady baseline exterior of myself by way of exterior motion.
I’d assume to myself to show my inside resolve that I needed to tackle all of the world’s issues and clear up them.
I might focus extra on exterior motion than inner regulation and create the drawback I needed to stop.
Implosions would solely harm me and people near me.
Those closest to me would really feel my tears, really feel my brittle nature. Things would repeat themselves as a result of I used to be trying to the flawed place to affect how I affected different folks.
I had the order of operations flawed with the self-imposed weight of the world on my again.
What if I had laughed slightly by way of the course of?
What if I had seen that I’d set off constructive emotional chain reactions by simply specializing in my inside self first?
Regulate inside first.
On airplanes, they are saying to repair your oxygen masks to your head first earlier than a baby’s. This state of affairs is the identical. It is in the greatest curiosity of everybody.
Fix that masks onto your self and provides your self a break! Partake in the comedy of life. You’ll set a greater tone for the remainder of the people in the cabin.
An instance – If we’re furious about the commute residence from work, it may be clever to sit down in the automotive for a second and take some deep breaths earlier than getting into the residence and wait a couple of hours extra earlier than making a ultimate name on committing to a date later in the week with a brand new lover.
Those breaths may result in humored sighs. “How ridiculous was Steve at work! That wasn’t my problem!” you may say as you chuckle.
You’ll say sure to that date, and that date may flip into your lifelong companion.
When I’m lighter, I hear folks higher. I see issues higher.
I’m a higher contributor to my exterior world after I snicker.
Empathy turns into extra accessible after we wiggle slightly.
After all, what are we?
We, people, are these wiggling atomic buildings hurdling by way of house.
Taking off the jackets of anticipation and eradicating accrued societal notion, we see that we’re all simply molecules swirling about.
I snicker at the gravity I used to position upon myself now – it doesn’t imply it’s gone endlessly.
It nonetheless occurs now and again.
I caught myself final week inserting stress on issues that have been already diamonds.
Then I invited a pal over for a playdate. Yes, that’s what my mom used to name the time scheduled with mates after I was 4 years previous.
That was the stage we set as two people in their 30s.
Together, we made alien sounds. We danced like robots who additionally knew a contact of thai chi. We laughed. We paused.
We rapped about meals.
We stayed up till the wee hours of the night time.
We made a large number.
It was really contagious.
Two compositions of excited atoms simply grooving.
We illuminated the darkish matter, recognized as technicolor foolish puddy that we may mould with our ideas and emotional being.
We would take a second to manage ourselves internally, in silence beside each other, then proceed in our dance.
I, from the United States, and them, an immigrant from China, collectively in concord.
It made me marvel about the concord of the world, and what it may very well be if all of us simply realized we’re a bunch of children in the sandbox of the universe.
Now, we would not all the time have the bandwidth or the capability to have a pal come over and play in the sandbox.
We can all be play specialists and create our personal comedy.
Lighten up the falls.
Set a greater stage in which to achieve dominion over our emotional states.
To select after we permit the gravity of the species to switch our orbit.
An ideal inspiration of mine for that is the comedic musician Marc Rebillet.
If you’ve gotten by no means heard of him, watch this quick clip.
He evokes me to be foolish.
He by no means does the identical efficiency twice. Each occasion is completely match for the second in which it happens.
We can do the identical to examine in with ourselves, to provide ourselves slightly well mannered mind therapeutic massage by way of laughter.
I ponder if all of us on this planet may snicker slightly extra, that we would drop the layers that forestall us from loving each other extra.
I can love others extra now that I like and worth myself.
Lightening the load has helped.
I can contribute to my communities in significant methods and make a constructive affect exterior of myself.
Loving myself got here in half from laughing at myself extra.
I may snicker as a result of I used to be in a position to separate myself from society for a second, then rejoin, understanding interconnectivity.
Chuckles give method to compassion.
Perhaps the wealthy particular person in their ivory tower may notice they might share the identical joke of life with somebody trembling at the base of their fortress.
Perhaps if the particular person with a psychological well being problem was proven that there isn’t a rush or stress from the exterior world, they may heal quicker.
It’s only a thought.
So, as Marc Rebillet would do, I problem you to seize a gown, placed on a beat, and rap about your day.
Be absurd.
Take a step away from this mutually agreed upon actuality and turn out to be a goofball.
Play like the youngster you’re inside.
You may simply change the world.
About the Author
A dance music producer, singer, and songwriter, Alex Wagner’s manufacturing profession contains releases on Atlantic Records, Big Beat Records, and extra.
As a disaster counselor for Crisis Text Line and authorized peer counselor with the state of Washington, he has organized a number of psychological well being consciousness occasions referred to as “Grooving for Good” leveraging the energy of music and the arts. He at the moment resides in Seattle, Washington. You can observe him on Instagram at @asinglewave.
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