In Will Schwalbe’s memoir We Should Not Be Friends: The Story of a Friendship, the wry author of books-about-books (see The End of Your Life Book Club and Books for Living) turns his consideration to an sudden friendship that originated in a secret society at Yale. Unlike any secret society I’ve heard of, this one geared toward connecting very completely different people in a purposeful group throughout their senior 12 months of faculty. And members Schwalbe and Chris Maxey might hardly have been extra completely different.
Early within the memoir, Schwalbe differentiates between nerds and jocks, positioning himself (theater child, homosexual, literature main) within the former class and Maxey (wrestler, scuba diver, avid motorcyclist) within the latter. When the 2 met, they repelled one another like misaligned magnets; one thing about Maxey’s boisterous masculinity put Schwalbe on edge. But they started to hear to one another, due partially to the rituals of the society, and an unlikely belief started to kind.
We Should Not Be Friends then veers from this nostalgic origin story into the dashing sweep of maturity. Early goals and unsure beginnings collect momentum and fling the 2 pals via varied adventures and, as time unfolds, into the tense compression tunnel of center age. Health issues, monetary issues, marital issues, goals realized and deserted, open communication and years of silence: All of it unfolds right here, managed via Schwalbe’s cautious narration as he successfully reveals how an fragile alliance in faculty yielded years of rewards.
As Schwalbe and Maxey share their lives, it’s apparent how a lot they assist and even change one another, partially as a result of of how completely different they’re. “Had it not been for Maxey, the me that is here today wouldn’t be me,” Schwalbe writes, and he goes on for instance the peculiar familiarity that emerges between long-haul pals who’ve identified one another throughout life levels, geographies and many years. If you’re somebody who appreciates the folks in your life, particularly these whose presence appears serendipitous, this guide will really feel directly recent and acquainted.
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