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Nightwing Is the Worst-Dressed Superhero, Actually

Nightwing Is the Worst-Dressed Superhero, Actually

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Just a few months again, my fellow Rioter Eileen Gonzalez wrote an article known as “Iron Man Is the Worst-Dressed Superhero and I Can Prove It.” I respect Eileen deeply, and so it’s with a heavy coronary heart that I’m obligated to level out simply how very improper she is. Tony Stark is a wretched dresser, in fact. But Nightwing, AKA Dick Grayson, AKA the authentic Robin, is the worst dresser in comics. And I’ve the receipts.

Now, like Eileen, I’m solely specializing in Dick’s civilian trend sense, as his early sartorial efforts as Nightwing have already been completely dunked on (together with by me). Like Tony, Dick has sufficient cash to afford to decorate nicely. And but he reaches into his closet each morning and chooses violence.

Dick spent most of the Golden and Silver Age sporting just about the similar purple sweater over a white collared shirt, and I’ve no complaints there. It’s solely when he hit adolescence and began hanging out along with his mates that issues bought…regarding. Like, right here’s what the Titans selected to put on once they discovered about hippies in Teen Titans #15:

One panel from Teen Titans #15. The Titans approach a redheaded hippie with a full beard and a beaded necklace. Robin is wearing a green mumu, a string of beads down to his ankles, and a shaggy black wig with feathers stuck in it. Kid Flash is wearing a yellow shirt, dark red pants, a brown panama hat, and a brown fur best. Wonder Girl is wearing a red piece of cloth draped loosely around her like a dress. Aqualad is wearing a black pageboy wig, cutoff denim shorts, and a blue T-shirt with the word "LOVE" on it.

Narration Box: Two lovebirds fly across the city sky...what of the Titans four? Do they know this score?
Hippie: Four way-out cats approaching...? Advance and be recognized, groovers! Eddie the Guru, that's me!
Dick: Greetings, Guru! I'm Feathers...this is Paradise Baby...Feet...and Wet and Wild!
Get prepared for an absolute CAVALCADE of horrible wigs.

That’s Dick on the left, adopted by Kid Flash, Wonder Girl, and Aqualad. Now, these are costumes for mixing in undercover (uh…good luck), but it surely’s nonetheless a sign that when free of the confines of his purple sweater, Dick won’t fairly know what to do with himself.

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One panel from New Teen Titans #26. Starfire and Dick are walking arm in arm. Starfire is wearing a white wrap dress with a pink ruffle around the neckline and sunglasses. Dick is wearing a green three-piece suit and a red and black striped tie and holding tickets.

Starfire: And I can't believe we're finally on a real date.
Dick: What do you mean? We've been going out for weeks now.
Kory, in fact, seems to be fabulous.

Sure sufficient, when Dick must put on a swimsuit in New Teen Titans #26, he’s nonetheless leaning on these Robin colours for assist. Can you think about seeing a man in a brilliant inexperienced three-piece swimsuit and purple tie and he’s not working at Santa’s kiosk at the mall? And we haven’t even gotten began but!

One panel from New Teen Titans #29. Dick is in a gym, hitting a punching bag. He is wearing hot pink briefs and matching ballet slippers. Wonder Girl is watching in the foreground.

Wonder Girl: You're determined to hurt yourself, aren't you?
Dick: I'm doing just fine, Donna. No problems.
He seems to be wonderful to me, Donna.

Dick’s slightly extra relaxed relating to understanding a pair points later, in that he apparently wears sizzling pink briefs and little matching slippers. Hey, when you bought it, flaunt it. (And he does: Dick spends a lot of New Teen Titans in a Speedo. Thank you, George Perez.)

But the ’90s was actually Dick’s time to shine. And by “shine,” I imply he nonetheless apparently hears the phrases “civilian disguise” and completely panics:

Two panels from New Titans #94. Dick is standing in a bedroom looking in a mirror. He is wearing a white button down shirt, a red vest, blue jeans, and a bright red wig and fake mustache.

Narration Box: Dayton's Mansion.
Dick (thinking): Mirage is right. This disguise really is dumb-looking.
“Welcome to Lowe’s! Can I help you find anything?”

Yes, that’s Dick, who wore this specific wig + mustache combo on a number of events. Starfire is such a forgiving girlfriend.

Two panels from different pages of New Titans #95.

Panel 1: Starfire and Dick are in a convertible. She is wearing a bra as a shirt. He is wearing an enormous, patterned green blazer, a white mock turtleneck that appears to have pleats down the front, and his hair is pulled back in a ponytail.

Starfire: ...Thinking of how we were there...and how everybody loved him...got me thinking. I'm mad at Mirage, too, for the stunts she pulled, but she seems to really care for you, Dick. Isn't this trick we're playing on her too cruel?

Panel 2: Dick is climbing a fire escape.

Dick: Car will keep in the parking garage for a while...and my civvies'll be safe on the roof.
Yes, Kory is sporting a bra as a shirt. Yes, she’s nonetheless the higher dressed particular person right here.

Sometimes, although, he went out as himself…and when he did, he wore a hideously patterned blazer two sizes too huge and slightly rattail. Also, what’s going on with that shirt?

One panel from New Titans #102. Starfire is on a bed in a nightshirt, clearly distressed and ripping a pillow in half. Dick and Flash are running towards her. Dick is wearing a yellow tee shirt with a green plaid flannel over it with the sleeves ripped off, blue jeans with holes in the knees, and black shoes. We can't see much of Flash but he's wearing a ripped up white tank top.

Starfire: Get away from me, Raven! Get away! Don't - don't!
Dick: Kory! Stop! Raven's not here!
Flash: Dick, she doesn't hear you...
Just as a result of your marriage is a shambles and your life is directionless is not any purpose to not misery your whole garments for the aesthetic.

Then I assume he bought actually into grunge? Honestly it’s the gown sneakers (I believe?) that basically make and/or destroy this outfit for me. Business on the toes, celebration on the garments.

One panel from New Titans #114. Dick is wearing burgundy plaid boxers over green bike shorts and holding his Nightwing costume. He looks frazzled.

Dick (thinking): Okaaay! There's nothing better than a little Nightwing action to help me take my mind off my problems.
This appears like the polar reverse of these tiny pink shorts from earlier than.

How many pairs of shorts at a time is simply too many? Asking for a pal (the pal is Dick).

And then, in fact, there may be the most notorious Nightwing outfit of all, from his first solo miniseries:

One page from Nightwing #2 (1995 series). Dick is standing in the foreground. His shirt is an oversized short sleeved white button down covered in red, blue, and green polka dots. His jeans are light blue and very tightly belted very high up on his waist. He is wearing loafers and his hair is in mullet cut that falls to his shoulders.
Dick’s outfit is sponsored by Dippin’ Dots (the ice cream of the future!).

Dick doesn’t need anybody to overlook he was raised in the circus, and he’s succeeding at that objective. I’ll give him this: the mullet is, , a mullet, but it surely’s extraordinarily lustrous. However, I believe it’s essential that you just all know that actually like a web page later he manages to do that to it:

One page from Nightwing #2. Dick is in the Batcave and wearing his classic Nightwing costume with the blue V across the chest. His hair is pulled back in a tight ponytail that snakes inexplicably back and forth behind him. If it was straight, it would probably fall to below his knees.

Dick: Way awesome.
No, Dick. No, it’s not method superior.

I do know I stated I wouldn’t discuss costumes, however hair is truthful sport! Apparently when it compresses in quantity it grows in size? Although generally it’s shorter than it’s proven right here, so perhaps it’s retractable. I don’t wish to take into consideration this anymore.

Finally, I’d prefer to current little characteristic I prefer to name “Don’t Invite Dick Grayson to Your Wedding Because He Will Look Ridiculous and Also Either the Wedding or Subsequent Marriage Will Inevitably Go Horribly Awry”:

One panel from Tales of the Teen Titans #50. Dick walks Donna down the aisle at her wedding. She is wearing a white gown with long sleeves. He is wearing a bright blue tux with black trim and a very ruffly white shirt.
I assume theoretically we may blame this one on Donna.

Here he’s giving Donna Troy away at her wedding ceremony. It’s a candy second, despite the fact that Donna’s groom is an terrible one who she finally divorced. But these ruffled cuffs are one thing.

Three panels from New Titans #100. Starfire approaches Dick at the altar at their wedding. She is wearing a white gown with long sleeves. He is wearing a simple black tux. His mullet is shoulder length and extremely spiky. In panel 2, Starfire whispers
Probably for the greatest that it ended so poorly. I imply, consider the wedding ceremony pictures!

This is the greatest tux Dick has ever worn to a marriage however the mullet is at its most unforgivable. (Also like three pages later an evil Raven assaults the wedding ceremony and incinerates the minister with hellfire.)

Part of a page from Nightwing Annual #1. Dick is wearing a black tux with light pink trim, a light pink vest, and a darker pink bow tie. His bride, a blonde woman, is wearing a white suit. They look unenthused.
They look so into it, don’t they?

The mullet was “better” and the tux was a lot worse at Dick’s second wedding ceremony…to a girl he was attempting to show had murdered her earlier husbands. Shockingly, this marriage didn’t finish nicely, both.

One panel from Flash #142. Wally is in the extreme foreground looking at Dick. Dick is wearing a regular suit and a ill-fitting blond curly mullet wig with some of his own hair sticking out from under it.

Wally: Hi, Batboy. Nice wig.
Dick: And it itches. This, I do for you. Appreciate me. Too risky to let Dick Grayson get noticed at a super-hero's wedding, true?
This just isn’t a favor, Dick. This is an imposition.

And lastly, we get a one-two punch for Dick’s flip as Wally West’s greatest man: we’ve each a hideous wedding ceremony look and a panicky civilian disguise! Not to say being 4 for 4 with disastrous weddings after an evil wizard makes everybody overlook the bride ever existed. (Don’t fear, Wally finally discovered her once more and he and Linda are nonetheless going robust. Love wins! For folks apart from Dick Grayson, at the very least!)

I needed to shut out with an instance of a latest, broadly hated growth in Dick’s life: that point he bought shot in the head, bought amnesia, and began calling himself “Ric Grayson.” Unfortunately (fortuitously), he was drawn by Travis Moore for lots of this time and he seems to be unbelievable:

One panel from Nightwing #50. Dick (or "Ric") is leaning against a pool table with a pool cue across his shoulders and his hands draped over it. He is wearing a black jacket open over a gray hoodie that has been unzipped halfway to show his bare chest. His hair is buzzed short.

Dick: It's my life.
Ric’s an enormous Bon Jovi fan.

Hm. So when Dick doesn’t bear in mind who he’s, he seems to be nice? I by no means thought I’d say we should always carry again Ric Grayson, but it surely could be the solely method we will save Dick from himself. DC, what to do.



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