Did Real Housewives of New Jersey air a brand new episode Tuesday? Or was it a rerun? Somehow, the reply is sure to each.
In the second episode of Season 13, we watched an entire lot of nothing. Teresa and Louie despatched out their marriage ceremony invites (which we already noticed on social media months in the past because of New York Housewife Ramona). New Housewife Danielle joined Jennifer for a debriefing of final week’s get together (we, the loyal viewers, have already come to our personal conclusions in regards to the premiere’s escapades so we don’t want an on-screen explainer). The episode ended with Danielle internet hosting a mozzarella cheese-making get together (the blandest of all cheeses) that devolved into a number of overlapping and exhausting arguments that lacked the aptitude of a gorgonzola or perhaps a gouda.
Here’s what all of it boiled all the way down to ultimately: Teresa and Melissa are preventing (once more); Joe Gorga and Teresa are preventing (once more); and Teresa swears on her lifeless dad and mom that none of it’s her fault (once more).
We’ve seen this earlier than.
(*2*)All in all, the women want to show it up a notch. We need them to flirt with us, entertain us, placed on a, you already know, present! (Take notes from Jennifer’s 9-year-old daughter who refuses to bike as a result of she doesn’t wish to threat damaging her “beautiful nose that’s actually natural” and calls out, “Where’s my bible?” throughout a downpour. That lady’s a star.)
With that in thoughts, we’re going to put out some suggestions for a way greatest to infuse some much-needed drama in Season 13. Basically, we’d like…
* Private tutoring from Nene Leakes or Candiace Dillard Bassett on how one can learn. (Enough of this “I’m just telling you how I feel,” simple nonsense, we wish word-play.)
* Margaret to convey again her pig tails. (What occurred to these little issues, anyway?)
* An uptick in Teresa’s bootleg idioms. (This week’s “a fresh of breath air” was a begin.)
* Producers to poke extra enjoyable on the girls through cheeky enhancing and sassy captions a la Potomac. (Where’s the self-awareness?)
* Increased display time from all the youngsters. (When Danielle’s son mentioned: “I wish I was a man because I could speak British like nobody,” what precisely did he imply? We want a confessional from that man.) Ditto Jennifer Fessler. (The manner she ravaged that mozzarella in sheer frustration was one thing to behold.)
Bottom line: It’s time for RHONJ to cease rehashing the identical feuds that each one stem from the sprinkle cookie period or ELSE THE ENTIRE thirteenth SEASON will move them by in a single massive boring blur.
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