The Highs + Lows of Being A Couple in a Band, With Holy Wars

Emerging alt-rock duo Holy Wars are right here to speak in regards to the highs and lows of being a couple in a band.

Bands usually examine their interpersonal relationships to being in a marriage, so what’s it like when there’s precise romantic pursuits in play? How does a couple preserve a wholesome relationship exterior of music whereas contending with typical points and friction that comes with being in a band?

Bands battle, they argue, they disagree… and it’s very pure. They additionally create timeless music and reminiscences that will fill a number of lifetimes of any extraordinary individual.

Before we get some relationship recommendation and confessions from Holy Wars, first, let’s be taught a bit extra in regards to the group.

What You Should to Know About Holy Wars

From: Los Angeles, California

First Album: EAT IT UP SPIT IT OUT (2022)

Latest Release: CULT CLASSIC EP (2023)

Holy Wars are a duo who characterize one other evolution in different music, mixing a handful of heavy genres collectively alongside undulating, beat-backed rhythms.

Starring vocalist Kat Leon and guitarist/producer Nick Perez, the couple are shaking up the scene as one of its most fun and promising newcomers.

They’ve shared the stage with the likes of Coheed and Cambria, Alkaline Trio and Papa Roach, succesful of interesting to differing audiences who might every search for particular qualities in music that different aforementioned acts do not.

Holy Wars, “Deux Ex Machina” Music Video

A band as a duo is all the time fascinating on the artistic entrance and the truth that Leon and Perez are additionally in a relationship presents much more intrigue. It’s not unprecedented for band members to both be relationship or married, however it stays a relatively uncommon incidence.

So, what’s it like being a couple in a band? We needed to know extra and invited Holy Wars to open up about their relationship, reflecting on the highs and lows of making it work amid being artistic and touring companions as nicely.

Read the complete interview beneath.

HOLY WARS, THE HIGHS AND LOWS OF BEING A COUPLE IN A BAND

How lengthy have you ever been collectively?

We have been making music collectively since round 2011, lengthy earlier than Holy Wars. We’ve been in a relationship since 2014.

In beginning the band, I truly put out an advert at Musicians Institute in Los Angeles. Nick auditioned and simply annihilated everybody else — he was so gifted.

I used to be very new to being in a band and writing music with others versus simply unhappy songs on my piano. I had no concept how influential this individual was going to be in my life professionally and personally.

Did your folks assume being in a band as a couple was a good concept?

Everyone knew it earlier than us, I suppose. No one was shocked when it occurred.

When we made it public, I even bear in mind a remark saying, “This is like when [characters on the classic TV sitcom Friends] Ross and Rachel got together.” Our connection and chemistry will need to have been fairly apparent. We have been pals first for 3 to 4 years, so it was fairly a gradual burn.

Of course there have been some considerations amongst pals, bandmates and our workforce about what would occur if this did not work out. Would our private relationship make it extra sophisticated?

It truly made every part higher and stronger. It was the very best choice we ever made.

What shocked you (for the higher) about your first tour collectively and the way it impacted your relationship?

Our first tour collectively positively modified the course for us and to have the ability to do it with a companion is certainly a enjoyable journey.

There are nonetheless pressures from the excursions, reveals and scheduling and so forth… and Nick and I positively care a lot, so we all the time put the band and music first on tour.

But discovering pockets of time to take pleasure in being in a new metropolis with all these new experiences simply feels extra particular if you find yourself doing it with somebody you care about deeply.

Bands battle. How do you forestall an argument/disagreement about music from spilling over into your private relationship?

We positively need to train steadiness.

Sometimes we do not know once we begin and the music ends and vice versa. As reverse in character as we’re, we do share one massive similarity the place we’re workaholics. We need to be creating on a regular basis, from music to movies… I’ll design wardrobe and so forth., so we’re all the time “in it.”

When it involves us simply having a quiet evening and enjoyable, we do not all the time understand how to do this. We discuss in regards to the band or something music associated on a regular basis.

Now, we’re very acutely aware about needing extra steadiness and separation of work life and residential life so we have now a more healthy mindset.

For fights… we do not often battle. However, we do have disagreements with route, songs, life, and so forth., however we all the time have a wholesome respect for each other. Even if one of us is having a bitchy second, it is by no means lengthy lasting and we have now a lot persistence. We simply apologize and transfer on.

When we’re touring with our band, it is like a household. We are mother and pop and they’re our kids, however all of us get alongside nicely. We aren’t too relationship-like on tour. It’s simply enjoyable and we encompass ourselves with nice folks with a comparable mindset that can make the excursions easy.

Holy Wars, “BODY//TEMPLE” Music Video

READ MORE: The 14 Creepiest Love Songs of All Time

What’s the very best factor about touring collectively?

Experiencing this with somebody you care deeply about I believe is the very best factor.

We are making such unforgettable reminiscences and doing it collectively. I do know we are going to look again at some point and say, “Fuck yeah! Look at this life we created and did whatever the fuck we wanted.”

What’s the worst factor about touring collectively?

Probably as a result of we do care a lot, if one of us has a dangerous present or we simply really feel “bleh” about one thing, it impacts each of us.

You would really feel dangerous for bandmates or pals having a shitty evening, however when it is your companion you’re feeling it on a deeper stage for certain. Nick and I do a good job not making our self-inflicted insecurities and whatnot anybody else’s downside. We know one another probably the most and may all the time inform.

Do you have got any pets? Who watches them once you’re on the highway?

We do! Nibs and Bella.

That is actually our largest problem once we are on the highway. We do have sitters however it’s laborious to seek out a good sitter. They’re each senior canine so we have now to all the time discover the very best one that is prepared to deal with and canine sit for an prolonged keep.

It additionally provides up worth smart and I’m often a wreck worrying about them the entire time, however it all the time works out!

What is one factor about one another you used to take as a right?

I believe I’ve taken as a right how affected person Nick is with me once I get darkish on issues (a true nihilist at coronary heart). When I’m disheartened, he’s all the time there to assist me by way of it.

I additionally skilled shedding each of my mother and father the primary yr of us relationship and he was there for me the entire time. I do know I challenged our relationship then, however it made us stronger.

[Nick Perez:] Kat is extremely fearless and decided. I used to assume it was simple for her, however I do know she offers her all into every part she does. Her tenacity is unmatched, which isn’t simple being a nihilist and all. She makes it look simple although.

What do you would like one other couple in a band advised you earlier than this all began?

Balance and benefit from the trip.

We each have a laborious time being current in the moments and/or having fun with every win. I’m studying how briskly life goes and the way fortunate we get to do that collectively.

But it should not solely be about work. It needs to be about having fun with what we do and having fun with it collectively. We are each “wake, work, sleep” folks and if you find yourself in a relationship with the individual, you’re employed.

Thanks to Holy Wars for the interview. Follow the band on X, Instagram, Facebook, YouTube and TikTok. Visit the Holy Wars web site for tour information and different particulars.