We Need to Talk About Otis and Ruby in Sex Education

Watch out! This article accommodates spoilers for “Sex Education” seasons three and 4.

Going into “Sex Education” season 4, I undoubtedly thought Ruby (Mimi Keene) and Otis (Asa Butterfield) would find yourself collectively. Maeve (Emma Mackey) and Otis had been at all times improper for one another — his obsession along with her at all times felt a little bit too shut to idealization (comparable to Ken’s shallow love for Barbie in the “Barbie” film, paradoxically), and their chemistry was additionally by no means truly so nice; it at all times felt to me like they had been too totally different from one another to actually work, and the scenes the place they lastly did get collectively simply felt awkward to watch.

Meanwhile, Ruby and Otis’s relationship was one of many sweetest components of season three. He appeared to assist her loosen up and open up, whereas she helped him get himself collectively and attempt for greatness. They simply appeared to work, and like many different followers, my coronary heart broke when Otis rejected Ruby the minute Maeve grew to become an possibility.

I undoubtedly thought season 4 would see Otis understand that Ruby was at all times proper for him, and it did really feel just like the present missed a possibility to enable them to discover their relationship extra deeply. However, thanks to season 4’s writing, it could have been a horrible thought for the pair to find yourself collectively. Because, in the end, Ruby deserves higher.

Throughout all of season 4, Otis treats Ruby poorly and reveals her that he is not prepared for a relationship along with her. He proves that he is prepared to settle for all her provides to assist him however continues to drop her and even ghosts her afterward till he wants her once more. He additionally reveals her that he is prepared to act inappropriately along with her regardless of being in a relationship. (I’m sorry, however falling asleep in your ex’s mattress whilst you’re in a relationship simply is not an amazing look, even whether it is an accident.)

Ruby could also be useless and a little bit of a bully, and she undoubtedly says some merciless issues to Otis and others alongside the best way. Still, nobody deserves the form of remedy Otis provides to her all through the season. If she’d been prepared to date him even after he prioritized Maeve whereas treating Ruby like she had no worth exterior of serving to him win his ego-driven election, that will have set a reasonably poisonous tone for his or her relationship. And even when Otis hadn’t been so impolite to her, he’d nonetheless want time to heal from his years-long infatuation with Maeve earlier than leaping into one thing with Ruby. In brief, it was by no means actually the precise time for them to be collectively.

Having been in a not-so-great relationship of my very own with somebody who did not deal with me with as a lot worth as I deserved, I can undoubtedly say one of many key items of courting recommendation I picked up whereas making an attempt to be taught from it was this: when folks present you who they’re, consider them. Despite what Hollywood rom-coms would have us suppose, we won’t count on somebody to miraculously step up and change their methods inside a relationship, particularly if crimson flags are seen from the beginning.

I’m not making an attempt to say Otis is an irredeemable villain or that his conduct is abusive, however he is undoubtedly a jerk to Ruby. It’s straightforward to neglect that thanks to his self-deprecating, nice-guy persona, however that makes his cruelty much more insidious in some methods — it permits him to get away with unhealthy conduct extra simply. Ultimately, regardless of what may have been, there are greater than sufficient causes to have fun the truth that Ruby turns him down in the present’s final scene.

Still, it is attainable that possibly after they each mature a bit, they may reconnect. (They’re each literal youngsters, in spite of everything, which is typically straightforward to neglect thanks to the actors’ actual ages.) Maybe Otis spends a while therapeutic after Maeve and learns to deal with folks in his life higher. Maybe Ruby works on a few of her shallowness points that make her act so imply on a regular basis (however which merely cover unbelievable vulnerability) and finds some real pals and self-love. Maybe just a few years down the road, they meet someplace on the road and strike up a dialog. Or possibly Ruby simply learns to thrive on her personal, which — as a lot as I perceive all of the followers who nonetheless ship them — nonetheless kind of looks like the higher selection to me.